More Excitement at our home

We have had quite the excitement here at our home. Allison has done it again, this time the arm. Thats right she has broken her arm. Last year she broke her right arm and last night she broke her left arm. It looks pretty bad to me. David took Allie, Joseph, Spencer, and Sammie to the park along with our Dog Danddie. They had been gone for some time. Then David comes to the door holding Allie and said she has broke her arm. He loads her into the car and I head off with her to the ER. We got there and they got us right back!!! Always love that we have a great hospital, that gets us right back!!! They set her up with an IV to give her pain meds and then they gave her a sedation med so they could set the break. It was hard to see her like that and in so much pain. She was sedated and still sat up and said no it hurts and then laid down and went back to sleep. Poor little girl she has been drugged up with IB Prophine, and ice for her arm. She will go to the Ortho tomorrow to see how it looks and get a cast!! In the mean while we are in between insurances and it has not been a month of being sick free like we had hoped but I know that as we trust in our Father in Heavens knowledge of our family that he is watching over me makes everything feel right and know that he alway watches and loves us!!

Scripture Study

I love our time to study the scriptures as a family!!! When we started scripture study when we first had our son 10 years ago it was short and to the point. It continued that way for some time and then when President Hinckley challenged us all to read the Book of Mormon, we did and it was taking a long time and the kids were getting restles. At about that time I was subbing for Singing time in Primary, which ment I got to bask in the spirit of sharing time. There I witnessed captive 3 and 4 year olds as the primary leaders taught the gospel through the scriptures. It was like these kids were in the scriptures and mesmorised by the stories. It was then that I knew that these women were callled of God and did what he needed them to do. And it was apperent that Heavenly Father had awaken in me a light and a teaching tool that I had been burried. I thought to myself I am going to teach my children the scriptures like that. I went home and as I read the scriptures I asked them questions and the Spirit came to the room almost instantly!!! I wanted to cry tears of joy, for my little roudy broode was now still and listening and had questions of their own. We finished the Book of Mormon and my kids were sad, they wanted to keep reading. I told them that we could and we would!!! I gave them all the option to pick a book to read out of the scriptures and to my suprise they picked the OLD Testament. I thought to my self this is going to be hard, but we are having so much fun with it and all the things we are able to talk about and bear testimony of. It amazes me that we talk about many of the deep doctrinces how much they understand and remember. I know that the Spirit testifys to each of their hearts and that they listen to the quietness of the spirit. Just as the primary song goes "And if I listen with my heart I'll hear the Saviors voice."
Tonight we were reading in the book of Exudus and Moses was explaing the last pluage that would come upon the Eygiptian people if Pharon would not let the Children of Isreal go. Talking about the law of Sacrafice, for many of these people hearing it for the first time. They were to take the first born male sheep and slaughter and eat it, all in a specific way. Then they were to use the blood and paint the door to their home with it, and this would protect them from the destroying angel that would kill all first born sons in Egyept. This was done as a great sacrafice, to a people that had not much, who were slaves. But they had gained faith in the Lord through his Leader Moses. And none of their people were lost. Because they had listened and obeyed Moses, the Prophet. We then talked about what that ment then and what it can mean in our lifes today. The prophets have asked us to obey the word of wisdom and promised if we do we will be healthy. The prophets have asked us to keep our minds clean by not watching bad movies or listening to music that sends the spirit away. When we do this then we have the spirit as a constant guide in our lives. The kids then said Mom the Egpettions did not listen to the prophet and thought that Moses was a "joke" and the next day they were sad because all there frist born were dead. It was amazing to be that a little teaching can go a long ways.
Our Spirits are sent here to have a physical Expereince and if we nurture our Spirit we will become strong.

Sacrafice is the ultimate expereince we must go through time and time again, just as the children of Isreal learned so long ago, we must continue to sacrafice and learn that we may become stronger and ulitmately sacrafice all that we have to know God. To me this is hard at times but as I do it I recivce more strength and courgage to keep on going, I did not say that Sacrafice was easy, or it would not be a sacrafice, But every Sacrifce to become closer to God makes it worth every hard part.

I know that God lives and has given us a plan to follow and we seek out God and learn to love him and follow him our lives will be full of Joy and Happiness.

New change is good right!!!

As you go through life and live you get used to the way things are and learn to live with them!!! Two years ago the company David works for was bought out by HP and with that came many changes. On of which was hard to live with. Everyone at the company would receive a 5% pay cut witch would lower our income enough that we would have $74 a month for all food, gas, diapers, toilet-trees etc... It was a very hard time for us and we fell behind in many bills just trying to live was very hard and at times I wanted to give up!!! But I prayed and relied on Heavens help to make it through. And then we slowly fell behind on our tithing not purposely but we had to pay bills so things like water and power and gas would not be shut off. And so we would pay it late or make it up the next time we would get money. I finally told David I could not do the finances any more it made me physically sick to do them. And told him that it was now his responsibility to handle them and I would answer questions and help out if he needed it. He made it a point to pay our tithing first and for the next 3 months we paid our tithing faithfully, and things all worked out, my faith had been weekend because I was inpatient and no letting the spirit guide my actions. I was listening to the whisperings of Satan instead of The Holy Ghost. I needed help and as I let my husband help me the blessings began to come again. My husband received a bonus at Christmas time. Then he was told that all employees with a pay cut would be receiving their pay back which would be a 5% pay increase!! I was so happy to see an end to the tunnel and that my Father had heard my pleas and knew that I was tested to my limits and could no longer handle this trial. Then enter two weeks ago when my husband comes home with and out of the blue interview for a company that he did not even apply to. He had posted his profile on the LDS job search web site and told that the hire rate was like 1.2%. Meaning that nobody really got contacted from there site. Well Heavens help was now playing a part in our lives. Because he was contacted by them had a very good first interview with Bank of America. Then he was called back and had a very good 2nd interview and was told they would contact him in 2-3 days. When that did not happen David emailed them asking if they had any more questions and checked up on them to make sure they would not forget him, and within hours they wanted samples of what he did and how he did it. The next day they set a 3rd interview up which David felt went very well. The next day he was contacted and moved from the selection process to the hiring process . He now had to pass a few steps to get an offer and because he has never been in trouble with the law we were sure that would be easy. He now has a verbal offer for a new job and we are so blessed to adventure in our next part of life. Lucky for us this job is one that does not require us to move. David has the option of working from home or working at a branch with empty office space. We are going to put in an office off the garage so for now he will work in a branch. We are so excited that we have been blessed with this new potiosion. We our so grateful for a loving Heavenly Father for his watchful eye on our family and the love that he has for each of his children.

It has been a while but I am still here

I have not felt much like writing but I am here to tonight. I have had a great day!! Getting much done. This morning I got up and showered. Got the kids breakfast and dressed hair done and teeth brushed and off to school for the older 3. Then I got the rest of the younger ones ready for the day, did some laundry and then bundled the kids and took them and our new Dog (Christmas Present)on a walk. It was a beautiful morning. It was fun!!! I came home and put on byu TV (on the internet) and listened to talks given by genral authorities as I played with the kids. It was kind of nice to just sit and play. I am usually doing something along the lines of playing around on the internet or cleaning the house. It was nice that the house was clean and I could just relax.


This afternoon while the kids had quiet time I cleaned the boys room, taking the toddler bed out and moving Michael to a big boy bed!! Kind of sad for me to think that this little boy is growing up so fast. He is still a very fun and snuggly little boy and I hope that he will always be that way:) Oh how I love my almost 4 year old. It seems like just yesterday he was placed into my arms.
The time seems so fleeting. I can not believe that I have been married for 11 wonderful years of many trials and many triumphs. In some ways it was just yesterday that we were married in the temple for time and all eternity. Honestly Marriage is a hard thing for me. I sometimes want to give up and as soon as I think that I am reminded of those sacred covenants that I have made with my wonderful husband and a loving Heavenly Father and it seems to be a bit easier to overcome. It was not meant to be easy but as we obey the commandments and love our Father in Heaven, and stay close to the spirit then The Lord makes it possible for us to make good choices and see the bigger picture more clearly. I love my Husband even though we disagree on many things. We both love our Savior and rely on him for many things. I was watching a devotional talk given by Elder Scott today and he had a young married couple he talked to, He asked them a question about do they agree on every thing to which they responded "No" He then asked them " What do you do then?" They said when neither of then agree on something they seek guidance from their Father in Heaven through Prayer. What an amazing answer that is. David and I have not been the best at regular Companion Prayer, Mostly me, and I do not know why. I used to be very diligent in prayer night and morning. It was like brushing my teeth if I had not brushed yet I was not ready to conquer the world. That was me and praying. When I got married I felt that I no longer had that private space in which I could pour out my heart to my Father. I do not know where that all went but I yearn for that again. There are weeks when I am really good at it and then I lapse again taking me time to get back to praying. The same goes for studying my scriptures. In High School I never missed a day reading my scriptures no matter where I was I had my scriptures and I read them, this continued into college and them I graduated college and had a hard time keeping up with a routine. Then I got married and had kids and find it hard to find a quiet time to study, and so I do good for awhile and then I lapse again.

Last year my goal for the year was to keep a cleaner house and well I did good for many months at that I went on vacation and and never got back into the groove of things again. SO My new goal for this year is to Pray every day and as I do that then implement my scripture study into my routine. But I do feel like as I pray I will feel more at peace and be able to make better judgments as a mother and wife for my family. I think that consistence in my personal spiritual progress will strengthen me and my family.

I know that this has been a rambling post but this is my journal and way to express my self. Lucky readers that read will know my feelings and thoughts :)

Worries about my 13 month old

Sammantha is a beautiful and very smart little girl. She is very determined and has to be perfect in all that she does. For instance she knew how to walk but refused to and then one day she just did not crawl at all, and rarely does now. In fact she gets very angry and upset when she falls. She refuses to speak or sign and then all of a sudden she will sign and she has said Jesus and Dadda and Momma. Sammie has never really been very vocal in her expressions. She did not start to laugh or coo until she was 9 months.... And now she will laugh every so often but for sure not an everyday thing maybe a few times a week. Quiet often I will find her trying to put things in the light sockets after she has managed to get the safety plug out. She loves to put things into thing and then take them out and do it again over and over. She does like to scream a very high pitch scream, when she wants something. This is beginning to diminish slowly thanks to positive parenting, and our persistence in teaching her manners. We had family pictures taken last night and that was fun. The studio had a table with chairs and the kids were playing legos. Sammie sat in the red chair while we waited to have our pictures taken and played legos taking them out of the mesh bag and then putting them back into it again. After we were done with the pictures and waited for them to print, Sammie went back to the table and wanted to sit in the same chair, but there was another little girl in it, she persisted until the little girl gave her the chair( nice little girl) And Sammie was not being rude, I think just cute and the little girl wanted to give her the chair. That just seemed odd that a 13 month would even remember the chair. Sammie has an impeccable memory and knows how to follow directions very well and at such a young age. She was 4 months old when she started doing that. I had asked to to go and lay at the other end of her bed and as I was going to help her she rolled over and did it her self.

Things that I am worried about her refusal to eat just about everything that is placed in front of her. She does eat veggies!!! She loves her milk. She loves cheese. She will eat GF pancakes like they are going out of style. She will eat a GF PBJ sandwich. She will also eat Fruits. That is about all that I can think of that she will eat. She refuses meats. She refuses many textures, and so to feed her on her already restricted diet (corn free Wheat free)is very hard. We do not force her to eat and believe that when she needs to eat she will. She still has occasionally diarrhea probably from something that she finds on the floor from one of the other kids. Or she had the opposite and is very constipated.

So my worry is that she has many of the red flags that autistic children have. She does not like to be touched or snuggled she has gut issues, She is self injuries and has fits that last well over an hour. She is very black and white. She is extremely smart and needs alot of attention. Yes she is only one and does need a lot of attention, but instead of developing and moving she is becoming more dependent. Now I do not know if I am being a worry woart or not but because I have a son that is Autistic and has had a ton of the same issues as she has now it makes me think and wonder what is going on in their bodies. My Micheal had me worried but I am beginning to not think so much anymore because he is becoming quiet the social bug. Children that have Autism seem to be more worried about themselves and their world and not so much anything or one around them.

So at Sammie's 15 month appt we will talk with the Dr. and see what he thinks.

I have a whole slew of specialist already being that my son has seen them with his Autism. I have been through therapies and know what to do already so that is not the issue just hopping that as we work on things here at home that she will be able to grow and maybe never have to have a diagnoses. other then Wheat allergy.


Speaking of Wheat allergy we are going to go back to the GI specialist and see what else we can do because to this day I still have never seen a regular poop come out of this kid, poor little girl. Any ways enough about what I am saying I better go to bed.

If you want to look at a great and amazing blog about Autism and getting to the root cause of it then look no further because her is one http://findingtherootcause.blogspot.com/

Happy Birthday to Sammie

Wow that was just about the fastest year I have ever had!!!! Sammie is 1 years old and full of energy!!!! Sammie is standing on her own when she wants. She cruses around furniture like a pro standing. She still thinks that crawling is the fastest method though. She loves putting things into things and is always looking for a cup to put her treasures in. She loves her sisters very much and is always following them around.
Sammie has a mind of her own, and lets everyone know this I have never seen a 1 year old like her thrash around and tantrum and she usually does not give up. She has not been very vocal , but lately she has become more interested in noise and is doing a lot of mimicking but us not very consistent with it. She is not very consistent in much of any thing. She was asked to fold her arms and she did proudly only during 1 prayer and that is all we have seen of it. She refuses to do what we ask her to do if she does not want to do it. Age typical I guess. Sammie had her 1 year check up and she is now 19lbs and 4oz. and she is 28n in tall kind of weird for me because all of my other children were much bigger then this by a year like 5lbs more. I guess that comes with her eating and the Allergy's that she has. She can not have any corn or wheat. She has what is called Congenital Sucrase-Isomaltase Deficiency. I am not sure that this is what she has because she can eat a lot of things just not a lot of grains. We limit her to rice and beans and she seems to do fine. She does not eat a lot though and it is frustrating because she is not gaining weight. But for the first time she has actually not had constant diarrhea with a horrible rash. for the most part her stool is regular. The kids are doing really well with not letting her have corn or wheat and letting everyone know that she can not have them.
I am beginning to think that she may have cileac because if she accidentally has any wheat gluten she has diarrhea shortly after she has had it. Poor little girl I hope that we can find out what is going on with her. Any way she is a happy 1 year old and loves her family and we all love her as well!!!

A Mothers Feelings

I appoligize for the long post but I needed to organize my thoughts so I can relax.

Ok so maybe I do not feel like this often but lately I have. I have 6 wonderful children that I love dearly. Yet lately I do not feel adaqute to help them with there individual needs. I feel that I have lost the support of good friends and am lost. I recently attended a class and the question was asked do you have the support of both your family and your friends when raising your children, espeaically your Autistic son. Of course my answer was yes but deep down inside I was searching for the friend that was there for me when I needed a break or the one that would see my need to get out for a minute to regroup. Or the friend that would say we love all your kids just the way they are because that is how Heavenly Father made them. Instead I was hearing them say we just can not do this any more. Your son is out of control and it is hard to be around him why can you not just put him in time out or why does he have to say those things can't you get him to stop. Or you should just spank him. Or this is what I would do. Well let me tell you, We do not spank because we feel that this just teaches the children to hit plus we used to and it never worked in the first place and we realized it when we had fewer kids. We have tried many things and found many things that have worked through prayer and scripture study and through insperation that we have followed. I know that My Father in Heaven is there to lead us in our parenting of His Children. He had entrusted them to us to love and nurture. I am grateful for this gift that he has given us to communicate with him through prayer.
I guess I just feel like when there is not someone to talk with and share feelings with about the fun things and the hard things life all of a sudden becomes harder and all I want to do is stay to my self and shelter my children from the pain I feel. It is hard to see your child want to make friends but the parents of other children will not allow it. How can that be, Christ would not do this, and his dicicples would not do that either. But we are all human and fall short of some things, I guess. I guess it is hard when others just ignore your family and do not put forth the effort to try just a little harder. To show love , instead they say we are afraid of your child or we do not want you to come over. I guess it is hard to hear things. I do have to say that Our son has made great progress and the Power of the Healing Atonement is working in his life as we are seeing him feel sorrow. He has the mentality to feel like a 4 year old even though he is 10. Yet he is extremely smart intellectuality beyond his years. He has no social skills and as we teach him it is a constant practice of what to do and when to do it. Why we do and how we do it. For me this is extremely difficult and overwhelming. Those that see this looking into the window never fully understand how me as a parent could let my son do this yet they never ask they just judge. There are just days when I ask Heavenly Father can you just give me an easy day just once please or an easy week. And when I feel like he has then it seems like he loads me full of trials again and says remember I am here do not forget me.

It is really hard for me to watch my other children suffer socially because they have to wear there brothers "label". My daughter will start school next year along with other kids at our church and yet I was not asked if she would like to be a part of a little preschool group. I know this sounds petty and stupid but when you know that she needs this to feel a part of something and crys and longs for a friend to come over to play. How do you tell her that all of her friends are at school and can not come over right now. I am at a loss of what to do. I do not like to hurt others and so I just do not say anything at all and then end up writing a book latter. like I am now. I just wish that I had a friend that I could cry on just once in a while or go out with and have a good laugh with. Do not get me wrong David and I do this but it is not the same when you have a girl friend that you can hang out with, someone that is home with their kids all day long. Someone that understands. I used to have many friends like this but I feel that my children have made them distant. And yes I will stand by my children 100% of the time my job is to love them and help them return to their Father in Heaven. I now feel like my friends outside of the church are closer and love my children more then the ones that I go to church with and share the same beliefs with the same goals and that is to get back to our Father in Heaven again. A dear friend of mine Allison's Kindergarten teacher just adores Joseph and looks past all the garbage and sees a sweet funny 10 year old much the way I imagine our Father in Heaven sees him. People like her I know will be blessed for their ability to love, no matter what.

I just hope and pray that I can feel more peace and know that I am doing a great job at being a mother of my wonderful and sweet children.